Recently I have seen a significant drop in serious flaming contributions to this forum. It is so unfortunate to witness this growing lack of entertainment - so without further ado, I present to you the automatic solution to create seriously good replies to any kind of discussion thread:
The Auto Flamer
Here a small example of it's excellent capabilities to assist you in finally expressing what you always wanted to say but didn't find the right words for:
Thank you! We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view, you ridiculous little carnival freak. Your post is an orgy of stultifying cacophonous verbal depravity; an exercise in literary impotence, and an offense to all of good taste and decency.
Clearly, the full area of your ignorance is not yet mapped. We are presently only exploring the fringes of that vast expanse. Anyway, who was talking to you or even taking you under consideration?
As Ellen Glasgow once remarked: "He knows so little and knows it so fluently."
What possessed you to think that you were capable of being entertaining or interesting to read? There's nothing wrong with you that couldn't be cured with a little Prozac and a polo mallet, or, better yet, suicide. Maybe you wouldn't read like such a pathetic loser if you weren't so dumb that even blondes tell jokes about you.
In future, wake up the dozy peglegged hamster operating that wheel-powered brain of yours before you start typing.