Lykkes diary

[Lykke]

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[Lykke]

WARNING .. WHINING - MODE

~ Just because it's "one of these days" ~

I'm normally a very positive person. Positivity makes you gain your goals in life. It might be a long path - but it's worth it!

I'm normally a very patient person. Sometimes it's worth waiting for something - and I choose to believe, things always have the ability to be better by time!

I'm normally a very caring person. Even though people dont care about me, that doesnt mean, I dont have to care about them?

I'm normally the one saying "Things will be alright, just relax and wait and see ..." and always with a laugh. Well, maybe I just trust in people too much - and companies and the world?

But guess what? Yesterday I just felt like FUCK THIS!

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I logg into PE. Lately I have been using FAR to much money than I should, always hoping that things would turn - always being positive and telling myself "well, you have a lot of fun in here, right, RIGHT?".

I'm lagged, more than usual. Loot is bad. I killed 15 atraxes in a row with 2 loot - both under 1 ped! What is happening here? I kill more - no loot! Before the hunt I fully repaired both sword, rifle and fap. I bought 70 peds of ammo. Loot just sucked. The priest and I went hunting. We went for corns - the same. Usually I tell the priest, when we complain about loot, that we should just wait and then loot will be better after a while - but nothing happend. FRUSTRATION! I spend 60 peds ammo on nothing - not even talking about the loss in decays - maybe I had a 10% return, If I'm lucky. I didnt even enjoy myself, as the yellow "no loot" messages just pressed me deaper and deaper into the lake of frustrations. Often I was SO lagged, that I could not even hit the mobs - I was just standing there - and everything was delayed. Suddenly I was dead, but didnt even see the mobs hit me, before it was too late. My sword dissapeared - I used ammo without even seeing I was shooting .. FUCK this!

We made a soc-hunt, going for thor's on Amethera. First I was several seconds, not talking about minutes, to get through the tp there. When I came, I was so lagged I could not even chat in the soc-chat. After trying to reach the others, I just gave up. Fuck this - and I tp'ed back to the tp to go to Twins. Twins was crowded as usually, but its not that big of a problem normally - but this time, I just couldnt move.

Someone was offering a trip to CnD. So I just took the decision. I should never have left. Calypso is too laggy for me. It feels like all the new stuff, grafic, the amount of new players etc. is just too much for the servers to handle? Well, I grabbed all my stuff from storage and agreed to travel. It took me ages to reach TI north tp. My screen was white for several minutes.

Finaly getting back to CnD - I could relax. But I was mad, frustrated, dissapointed. I have never been SO close to quit PE. I still am confused.

This is not only concerning hunting. Even though I do global and hof in crafting, glad you dont know how much I spend on that Mining is just NOT my luck. Well, I have been lucky on CnD - but NOT compared to the loss in peds.

Someone please show me the way back! What went wrong or what did I do wrong? Is it my choose of weapon, armor, mobs? Am I just another n00b? Maybe its my pc - never had problems before ... but then again .. .. my pc doesnt decide the loots for me? I really really used to love this game. It was / is my second life! But there MUST be an easier way? Were is the light? *SHRUGS* .. MA, why do you make this so hard for us?

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Then again - my positive and patient personallity appears ... well, Lykke TheNun, dont quit yet? Maybe tomorrow ... things will be better ... *sighs*

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FUCK THIS .. but I'm not quitting. I'm gonna stay on CnD and use my energy on the events only! Lag on Calypso means no soc hunts for me down there - or any other activity concerning many people. Time will show what will happend next!

As said, I'm normally not whining, unsatisfied, unpatient etc ... - and I have never had a problem about spending money in PE, depositing etc. - but there comes a time, were you just feel you are being walked on too much - and then you have to stop up, wonder and react! Or am I just "loosing" it?

To my society: Thanks for your support and understanding for my situation lately! You are all great people! <3 ... I really need a


*G*.... I still love Lootius though .... *G* *eyerolls and starts praying again*

[Lykke]

"Do you believe in fairies? … If you believe," he [Peter] shouted to them, "clap your hands; don't let Tink die."
Peter Pan

What a relief to go back to "da clubba". No more lag. No more "noise" on "my" servers. Even though I can see more and more people are entering the resort, the problems I have up there are nothing compared to my problems on Calypso.

I went to the apartment and put in the stuff I brought from the storage. I never did anything to this place, but maybe I should make it nice and cosy now? Though cosyness costs money too - so I guess I will have to wait a good time before being able too *G* - Nevertheless - I might just redecorate with all my n00b-items somehow.

The feeling of getting back up there - was the feeling of getting home. The same feeling after a rl travel, were you are eager and so excited in the beginning - but when you reach a sertain level, you just need to get back in wellknown surroundings. Not that I dont know Calypso. Maybe I even know it too well. It IS nice hunting in the open fields, with the bright sky above you - being able to just run and run forever. I am sure that the fresh air and sun is good for me too. My teint has got a bit light lately!

But getting back to "my" place gave me the happy thoughts I needed to keep my spirit and whishes about having fun and enjoy playing new energy. Yesterday I got a new event-asignment together with MindStar9. Its really so exciting, but when I saw it, I was really too tired to being able to show my joy on the forum. Today, after a good night sleep, I realise, this could be the thing I need as things are now. I wish to spend more time on the events and on the club. Not meaning I wont hunt or craft - I really enjoy that. But being away from PE yesterday gave me the distance to look at PE from the outside and point out the things I really like about this game.

I still am going "outside" PE too. Its an awesome idea. The whole Church of Lootius concept we are making now - and our new forum - might also generate leads furth and back from other games to PE. In that way PE also would gain some of the experienses from maybe new Lootiusians - but elsewere hardcore players!

I am so greatfull I have so many friends in PE and on this forum. People have been very concerned and honestly worried about what is going to happend now. That is why I just love this community, and I know perfectly well, that starting over a new place would never be the same. I have been on a lot of game-forums, but no place is that nice, honest (and polite, believe it or not), mature and caring as this forum!

I am sure, that all the happy thoughts and best wishes from you guys also helped me to realise, that its not a question about getting it all. But to enjoy the things you get!

[Lykke]

today I got weird pm's about my new avi picture... people wants me to replace it with the old one ... but I kind of like the Nun bitzcha ...

... so if any of you feel your fingers itching while reading the last lines here - could you please +rep me then instead of writing me how horrible ugly I look? I need +reps more than I need that kind of disturbing pm's ...

Thanks in advance







n00b priest ... !

[Lykke]

Oke ... I'm voted down ... No one but me and a few others seem to like the Nun-bitzha-avatar ...

I will though keep her here untill Friday .. just to see if that really has an effect on the priest ... IF it has ... I might just have to considder turning back the tiny Nun-aka-nurse-costume I bought to make the evening special DAMMIT !!!!

[Lykke]

OHH KNOES .. it might be too late now ... but now the avi is changed ... ANYWAY .. just to keep it in here forever ... :




just luv it!

[Lykke]

So many words on my mind - Im just too tired to write it all down ...

I have spend lots of time on the TV-event. The time was short and that made it all under pressure. The fact that I did and do have a lot of RL business too to deal with, did not make it easier, and often the frustration appeared, since the feeling of not beeing able to do enough knocked me down.

The event day came and also time for decoration. HUGE thanks to Sharyn and others for helping out - that was GREAT Fortunately all my stuff - wood, ME and fruit - dissapeared afterwards, but I guess people just wanted to help me clean up the place ?

The evening. LAG LAG LAG. Most of the time - I could not move, I could hardly chat. Everytime I wrote something it came in the chatwindow several seconds after. I just stood there, felt kind of stupid actually *G* But people were AWESOME. It looked like they had a great time - and that was most important. And MindStar did as always an awesome job too, handling the whole event. Nice to see NEVERDIES appriciation of that afterwards. Huge gratz to MindStar!

I got a chest! Yes - I can hardly believe that a piece of PE (and a good piece, if you ask me) is having MY name on it? Here is the beautifull new Lykke wooden chest - and me and Buzz standing next to it:


Click to enlarge

I am SO happy AND I am so greatfull that Buzz decided to give me the first crafted chest *HUGE SMILE* I saw one in his CND store - it was blue - REALLY cool. Maybe I can paint mine pink?

I use it for tailoring material stuff. And I must say, its already an important part of my storage. I just put all the heavy stuff in it - and everytime I want to go hunting, I just place it in apartment - SO easy. Much easier than placing lots of stuff there. ALSO I wont use off the limit of items in apartment. The chest contains up to 80 pieces weeeeeeeee

AH well - real life? Just busy - frustrating ... but else, nothing much! Nothing new! Nothing exciting really... oh ... but I still love the priest though

[Lykke]

SO I recently came to some conclusions in my life - both PE and RL. AhH well - here we go

Job-wise
If you are NOT satisfied with what you are doing - then do something about it.

Noone else will, and noone will thank you afterwards, for all the stress moments. Not stressed because of too much work, but stressed because every morning going is a pain in the a* and the feeling that even being home starring at a white wall would be more exciting than going. Stress, because the feeling of not succeeing in the things you are spending half of your life on is so very frustrating. Stress, because every day that goes by seems to be vasted somehow. I