Boy meets new world - Page 2

Apple GREEN · 03-14-2008, 14:44

Day 2 part 2

Bull was guiding us through the city, which appeared to be Port Atlantis. I was starting to get used to the noise and the colors, though it was nothing like I have ever seen on earth. It was as if everyone ate some plants that weren’t legal on earth (actually later I found out that that’s exactly what they did). Talking was still out of the question so using my sight and ears had to be turned in on maximum. Anigav didn’t have my talking problem – don’t know if the booger neutralized the effect of those plants, or he was used to eating at McDonalds (he was from Vegas, one of the 3 places on Earth where Micky D’s were still tolerated). He was bombarding our guide with questions:
A: How many people live here?
B: nobody really knows
A: how many city’s are here?
B: nobody really knows
A: what are we going to eat?
B: nobody really knows
A: who’s controlling the place?
B: some insect like creatures from Bottengerg, it’s far away, none really seen them, but rumors say they are evil and they steal children for their feasts while dancing around the statue of Caligula with a cockroach body.
A: What is that thing with blue lights where people disappear and appear from?
B: It’s an evil place, if you go there; you might never come back, as only chosen few come back, if they’re lucky.
A: Why don’t they seem upset coming out of there then?
B: Would you be upset if you returned from a place of no return?
After a while Bull started to get irritated, his neck was turning red, so I jumped in to save the day: “wow en oui wu ou eik om mowei??”
Both men stopped and looked at me: they were apparently confused.
Sexy Bull looked at Anigav: “what’s up with your friend – is he French??”
Having not a slightest clue of how to explain myself I opened my mouth wide and showed it to the guys. “AAAAAAH, hehe” – was Bulls reaction. He kept on giggling, reached into his pocket and took out some yellow berries:”here, eat these”.
I didn’t trust the guy, but speaking like French wasn’t something joyful so I followed advice and ate the berries. In a few minutes my tongue deflated and THE question was asked again:” How can we make some money?”.

Apple GREEN · 03-18-2008, 15:53

Day 2 part 3

“I thought you’ll never ask!!!”… It was surprising to hear so much enthusiasm from someone who didn’t even have pants. I mean what would he know about money if even those were out of his league. He caught my look and explained: “Don’t pay attention to that – not wearing pants is a statement of my individuality, just like my name”. Well, whatever makes him happy, main question stayed the same.
“Guys, I’m going to show you a gold mine, which will make you pedzillioners as long as you stick to my plan, and stay loyal”.
“Anything you say, boss – lead us!!!”, , Sexy Bull chose a small street north and we took off into the wilderness. Along the way we were getting the instructions: “Basically, what you noobs, sorry, guys going to do are get the magic powder from the animals. That stuff makes people do insane stuff! Remember pictures of freaks with spoons hanging on their nose? Well, here it is child’s play. When you’re skilled enough traveling through space will be a piece of cake.” WOW, this sounded so insane our ears felt like they were growing bigger, just to catch every word given to us. Teleportation?? Magic powder?? DAMN now that was cool. Suddenly we heard a roar.
- “What the hell is this?”
- “Don’t worry guys, these are called daikibas, they are harmless, and they are the ones that’ll make you rich”
- “They don’t sound too friendly, what if they attack??”
- “Attack, shmattack – stop being such pussies, now I got to go, just don’t come too close to it, concentrate and pretend you’re begging for sex from your girlfriends, after coming home with lipstick on your undy’s, wuahahahahaha” and he took off, leaving us there, lost and confused..
OK, let’s try: we came closer, slowly and cautiously, looked at each other, then the beast, then each other, then the beast. I concentrated on it: nothing. I looked at Anigav – he was all red, sweating from his forehead (hehe, I bet this didn’t work on his girlfriend). Nothing. I tried again: concentrating, begging for the unknown from this furry beast – nothing. My partner in strive was doing his best, not breathing, concentrating, when suddenly he passed gas. It wasn’t one of those silent elevator gasses – it was a roar of a hungry lion coming out of his ass. Without warning mob charged at us and started to bite, ripping chunks of meat out of my body, hurting me so bad I couldn’t even scream from pain. Then I died…

Apple GREEN · 04-03-2008, 15:48

Day 2 Part 3

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, tingly sensation overwhelmed my body. It felt like millions of ants ran up and down me, giving an occasional bite. Not a pleasant feeling, but pain meant I was alive, and that was hard to comprehend, as it was kind of hard to forget dieing just seconds ago.
- “ Someone please pinch me!” – (I’ve heard this lines so many times in movies it just had to be said). Suddenly I felt five or six titty twisters all over my body. That brought me straight to reality. “ Stop it you bastards!!!” “You asked for it, sissy boy” – a cute girl in same clothes as me was standing on my right. She had something stunning about her. I couldn’t stop staring at her laughing eyes. Though the face stayed serious, eyes sparkled and projected that naughty bad girl inside that drove me wild. Then I looked down and she had a pair of these perky beautiful..”AAAUUWW” – she pinched me again.
-“Stop staring, you pervert!”. Didn’t think it was so obvious, but that pinch took me back to reality. God damn, I just died a minute ago, and this didn’t look like heaven. Or at least not how I imagined it. What the hell had happened to Anigav? Did he survive? Did he even die? Then the buzzing came and voila: my friend appeared out of thin air. He started touching himself, still not believing he was here:
-“I’m alive!!!” a happy roar came out of his throat. I pinched him just for the hell of it. Anigav looked at me with the hurt puppy eyes: “Why did you do it?”
-“ Yeah, why did you do it?” girl came to his defense, straightened his cloth and looked angry. “Poor you, is he always so mean?”
-“Yes, always” – and bastard took a step away from me closer to her. Unbelievable.
-“I see you’re new here, let me explain a few thing before you get in trouble” – girl took Anigav’s hand, gave me another angry look and lead the way.