That the FL does not show full names is a bug, it's not supposed to be that way.
I think there are alternate ways to solve most of these issues you mentioned, including the player register (though that's optional) and good old paper and pen. If you're doing an expensive coloring project, really the only way you can make sure it's the same person (if you don't already know them) is to have them show you their first name, then add the second, then add the third.
I don't disagree that there are some benefits to having one-way contacts. The player register makes the two-way contacts not so critical, as you can add anyone whenever you need to. I've also said
MA needs to develop tags or folders for contacts, so you can group your soc contacts separately from your trading contacts, etc, because you're right, it's hard to visually separate friends from others.